CLWS News

Middle School Dance on Saturday – Reflections from a Parent with Young Children

Caroline Askew

Chaperoning the eighth grade dance on Saturday night put a skip in my step that hasn’t yet left.  Picture this: 77 children from three different schools jumped up and down for 2 straight hours, obviously enjoying each other’s company and relishing the mass-social time. The DJ played classics and some of the students’ clear favorites. When crowd pleasers came on, the children formed huge circles taking turns showing off their moves in the center. A group practiced “the worm” in the hallway and then debuted their new talent on the main floor to great cheers of approval. The newest children in the school were fully in the mix, if not in the center, as if they had been here for 10 years. During the slow dance the 8th graders broke into pairs and practiced the waltz, which Mr. Burnstein taught them last week. There was one (and only one) moment when one child seemed to be sitting alone, inspiring a chaperone to pull 2 boys aside and direct them to take her out on the dance floor. So they did, as if that is what you do when a classmate is sitting alone. No one tried to sneak away. No one did anything naughty. One parent poured mean Shirley Temples.  Other parents provided cupcakes and roses for everyone who came.

The last time I attended a middle school dance was my own Sadie Hawkins at Anthony Middle School. Some of it was fun and some of it downright scary. When I reflected upon that with another parent he said that he wouldn’t review his past middle school dance experience because of PTSD. Not here. Another parent admitted to feeling misty at the overwhelmingly touching and jolly quality of the evening. It was hard not to continually smile. Mainly, I felt like laughing.

It seemed to be all upside, all inclusivity, with no apparent downside. How could this be? How do I reconcile this image with commonly heard woes about surly adolescents? I feel a renewed sense of both relief and enthusiasm for my young children’s fortune in getting to attend middle school here. It has been 2 days and I still feel happier.

Articles

Kim John Payne: The Holiday Season: Putting the Genie Back in the Bottle, Huffington Post, November 4, 2011